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Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Music To Get Chased By A Street Sweeper To, Anal Probe, Stranger Danger, and Greatest Hits Vol. 1.
1. |
Anal Probe
02:31
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There was something strange in the sky that night
As I gazed up at the stars what did I see
I can't claim to be an expert on these things but
It looked like a U.F.O. to me
There was something weird going on that night
Little green men approached me and said hello
Then they handed me there business card
Just as I was beamed aboard a U.F.O.
Anal probe inside of me
It was just like on tv
I only went out for a stroll
Next thing I knew there was a probe in my butt hole
I don't want to come off like a nut
Or somebody that's just looking for attention
Or at least that's what I said in my book that
I'll be signing at the U.F.O. convention
Well they strapped me to a table in their lab
As I began to convulse and jerk
Boy I sure had a lot to talk about
around the water cooler that Monday at work
Anal probe in my rear end
Now we're more than just friends
Well at first it kind of stings
But I've been meaning to get out
and try new things
Here we go
Probing it up on a Saturday night
Anal probe inside my butt
I'm flattered that I made the cut
Don't feel left out You'll get your turn
Maybe next week the spaceship will return
Anal probe inside of me
Sounds like some crazy conspiracy
But I promise that it's all true
I told Barbara Walters in a tv interview
Here we go again
Probing it up on a Saturday Night
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2. |
Background Check
01:58
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I wanna join a fancy country club someday
but when I try something always gets in the way
They're always digging up things from my past
Like the time that I caused that atomic blast
Background check
We're gonna found out everything that you've done
Background check
Before you can rent a car or buy a gun
Background check
You can't hide anything from us
Background check
It says here you once hijacked a bus
One time police found a dead hooker in my pool
Now no one will let me teach Sunday school
why do they make a big deal out of every little thing
Like a measly parking ticket or embezzling
Background check
We're gonna find out everything you ever did
Background check
Before we let you go near a single kid
Background check
Before you're allowed to make balloon animals
Background check
We have to make sure you're not a cannibal
Checking up on you
Before you judge let's be fair after all come on
We've all been caught stalking Ricardo Montalban
I met a girl on that dating site that's all the rage
Turned out to be a terrorist plus she lied about her age
I should have done a
Background check
Have a seat we've got all the dirt on you
Background check
Every deviation and taboo
Background check
Bad credit and controversial views
Overdue library books and restraining orders too
Check it out
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3. |
I Wanna Be Jed
02:03
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I wanna be Jed oh yes it's true
I wanna do all the things that Jed people do
Oh yeah
I'm gonna live it up all day long
Relaxing in my mansion by the cement pond
Oh yeah
Don't you wish that you were Jed too
Don't you wish that Jed was you
I'll whittle on my wood just you wait and see
You too will wish that you were Jed like me
Oh yeah
Don't you wanna be Jed, oh yes it's true
You can dine on five-star vittles too
Oh yeah
Don't you wish that you were Jed too
Don't you wish that Jed was you
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4. |
Bug On My Windshield
05:15
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Driving down a lonely stretch of highway
on a sunny afternoon
I had a couple of cocktails
Now I’m on the road and headed for doom
My phone rang I picked up said hello
and I started to chat
I got careless I wasn’t paying attention
When suddenly there was a splat
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
I know I should have called 911 but I
panicked and fled the scene
I looked around for witnesses
It all felt just like a bad dream
I peeled it off the glass I hid the body in my trunk
And that night I dug a hole in the ground
I buried it deep deep in the woods
I made sure it would never be found
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
I feel so guilty
It eats away at me
So very guilty
It really bugs me
I found a safe house I could stay at
on the outskirts of town
A place where I could lay low for a while
Intel everything cools down
Try to figure out my next move
Try to forget what I’ve done
Maybe disappear down to Mexico
A killer on the run
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
I’ll never forget what happened on that day
It will always haunt my dreams
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night
in a cold sweat as I scream
the guilt and pain has gotten so bad
I’ve turned to booze and heroin
Will I ever escape the dark secret of my past
Will I ever be the same again
Bug on my windshield
Bug on my windshield
There's a bug on my windshield
A dead bug on my windshield
Dear God what have I done
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